My fondest wish

My fondest wish, originally uploaded by Kodamakitty.

I asked a palmist once, if I was ever going to be recognized for my talents and abilities, and she said yes. And then, many months later, I receive this fortune. Kooky!

Do I even need this kind of recognition? I would argue that everyone wants to be recognized - for their opinion, their thoughts, their talents. It's about respect and appreciation.

What does this have to do with being good enough? Isn't it enough for me to know that I'm doing my best? Well, yes, to a great extent, but I think without recognition or feedback from others one could become narcissistic or convinced of one's worthlessness.

One of the many reasons I haven't really put forth the effort to lose weight has been an odd need to prove myself beyond looks or what I have previously dismissed as "swimming in the shallow end with floaties" - buying into the idea that one could be pretty or smart, and I was clearly destined to be smart. Which of course, is total bullshit. I am blessed to have friends who are both beautiful and brainy and I wouldn't put up with this kind of thinking from them, either.

So, now that my health is on the line, and now that I've accepted that I do want to look my absolute best and see what my best weight is where I can still eat what I like in moderation without having to spend hours in the gym, I want one of my talents to be that I can truly take care of myself and my health. It is a talent I have underutilized thus far and I plan to develop it.

As for recognition, in starting this journey I've received a lot of amazing support. Quiet, steadfast, stand-by-you support. For which I thank you (you know who YOU are) with all my heart.

And a special thanks to Geoffrey, who posted this on my Fiickr photo with which I created this blog:

galfridus73 says:
You've always been more than good enough, Sweetie, no matter what. I love you! I love you, too, Geoff!

Awwwwww... :)

^_^